【范文二】

　　Recreational Activities

　　In people’s daily life, (1) there are various recreational activities (2) apart from studying or working (3) ranging from Karaoke or dancing to computer games or sports games. Such activities are beneficial as well as harmful to us if undertaken inappropriately. (4)As far as I’m concerned, we should pay more attention to the advantages of various recreational activities

　　(5) For one thing, those recreational activities are great and necessary, because they can help people relax from the hard work and study. Some of the activities, such as hiking, jogging, can help people relax physically; while some of them, such as surfing the Internet, can help people relax mentally. For another, it can improve our communication skills because most of these activities are done with others.

　　(6) However, if we spend too much time on singing, dancing or other games, we might fail to concentrate on our duties such as studying our working, which in turn may lead to further consequences. Therefore, recreational activities should be done within a certain limit so that we can keep a proper balance between recreation and studying or working life.

　　【點 評】

　　(1) 引出現象，直擊主題

　　(2) apart from “除了”

　　(3) 使用ranging from列舉娛樂活動，呼應主題(多種多樣)�，F在分詞作定語

　　(4) 使用As far as I’m concerned引出自己的觀點

　　(5)例舉娛樂活動的益處

　　(6) 使用轉折詞however話鋒一轉，談及例舉娛樂活動的益處

　　(7)亮點詞匯 concentrate on，in turn，lead to further consequences，keep a proper balance，為文章添彩。