例3．（8分段）
�豹盬omen are playing an increasingly important part in society today. Many Women today are playing an important part at works that was thought only could be done by the men before. For an example. Some women are not secrtary in the office, instead, they become manager of a company.

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With the changes in their social role, women’s position in the family has been improved as well. In the world today, more and more women have their own job. They get their own salary, and become more independent from their husband. With the economic situation improved, their family position is improving.

�豹盜n spite of these changes, the liberation of women has not been completely realized. Many husbands only want his wife to stay at home, and do house works or do some shopping. They only want their wife to be a housewife, but not a manager of a company.

　　東方教育點評：基本切題。有些地方表達思想不夠清楚，文字勉強連貫；語言錯誤相當多，其中有一些是嚴重錯誤。具體問題剖析：
　　（1）論證不夠深入，缺少事例，缺少說服力。
　　（2）文字缺連貫、且顯累贅，如第二段可以把各句再改得簡練一點并矣惺實鋇淖�硨懯�?BR>　　（3）語言錯誤相當多，如“For an example”，“Some women are not secrtary in the office, instead, they become manager of a company.”應改為“Some women are on longer secretaries in the office, instead, they become managers of the companies.”（單復數）

　　例4．（11分段）
�豹盬omen are playing an increasingly important part in society today. More and more women go to work to earn money instead of keeping the house or looking after the children. Women have entered many fields of society including scientific field. As we know, many women sports teams have won the world’s champions such as Chinese women’s Volleyball Team.

�豹盬ith the changes in their social role, women’s position in the family has been improved as well. Husbands are not the masters of wives in many places. Husbands and wives are equal now. They join together to overcome difficulties and share happiness.

�豹盜n spite of these changes, the liberation of women has not been completely realized. Also in some places. Women are considered being “thing” belong to men. They have little chance to find jobs. They don’t get equal pay for equal job. This is a problem must be solved not only by society but also by women themselves.

　　東方教育點評：切題。表達思想清楚，文字連貫，用詞比較準確，但有少量語言錯誤，如“Also in some places. Women are considered being “thing” belong to men保�应改为“Also in some places，women are considered being the “things”that belong to men”